The First Cut Is The Cheapest
	Fame - as Tiger Woods now knows - is a double edged sword. Or if Gillette were to get their hands on it, it would be a super mega macho triple edged sword with aloe vera - because even macho men need to take care of their skin. And soon they'd change their minds and decide fame is now a four-bladed because men who use a three bladed razor have had their testicles removed and should probably start seeing a gynaecologist. If the first few days of the 'Tiger Woods Scandal' non-scandal hurt him in that area of the body where a heart should be and that's grand. You can drink and one-night stand that away. The pocket is where it's really going to hurt. Gillette - those people who regularly show attractive women hanging off men who happen to use Gillette products in their ads - have now come to the conclusion Tiger isn't the right type of person to sell grooming products that the ads say will lead to sexual success with the ladies. Now Accenture have dropped Tiger from their advertising campaigns. That's strange, I would have thought their knack of getting vastly inflated sums of money for doing an intangible amount of work would be the perfect fit with the world's best golf ball into a hole hitter. Tiger is finding out that if you want fame, it will never be on your own terms. It might feel like it for a while, but that's just dumb luck. You might argue that the intrusion into his personal life has been excessive, but when all these companies came along with their bags of gold and said "you're the man to flog our crap - have a few millions dollars" he could have said no thanks, I'm a golfer, I think I'll stick to the golf" and as every good golf coach will teach you, kept his head down. He chose to use his worldwide profile for what he thought was a free lunch and now that the bill has arrived he's crying foul [yes, I am writing this just before lunch and I'm hungry]. I couldn't care less where Tiger Woods decides to stick his putter, but don't complain when the publicity you courted comes back to bite you in your frequently-bobbing-up-and-down ass.	Tiger Woods Possibly mid-transgression
	The 'It's Not Nice, But He Really Had It Coming' Bit
	It's a bad time for ladies men across the world. AC Milan owner and Italian Prime Minister for Getting Jiggy With It gets whacked in the kisser. If that wasn't bad enough, his club lost 2-0 at home to Palermo. There is some good news for him however - chicks dig scars.
	Sports. Personality. Of. The. Year. The fact that everyone understands those words yet no-one really gets what they mean when used in the phrase BBC Sports Personality Of The Year is confirmed as Man Utd squad player, Ryan Giggs wins the award. Joe McElderry wins the prize for Lifetime Achievement.
	An Arsene Wenger outburst sparked Arsenal's rather easy comeback against Liverpool. Glen Johnson must have been only person to hear it as he was at fault for both goals and the Gunners didn't have to do a whole lot else to keep a Liverpool side who looked like they spent half-time eating Christmas dinner at bay.
	Jens Lehmann isn't getting any more mentally stable with age. He took a toilet break Stuttgart's Champions League game with Unirea Urziceni last week. And it doesn't look like he washed his gloves afterwards either. And rather impressively followed it up by going a bit mad on the domestic front.
	Super Extra Bonus Tiger Bit
	Has the snorter turned gamekeeper? Kieren Fallon says that the use of drugs in horse racing is widespread. I know for a fact horses are mad for the ketamine.
	Snooker also has a drug problem - you need to consume vast quantities of them to watch it. Ding Junhui wins the UK Championship in what was apparently an entertaining final, but still had all the appeal of a My Family marathon.
	Tiger's caddie gives it the 'I know nothing, I from Barcelona' in response to the news of the transgressions. Steve Williams receives around 10% of whatever Tiger gets, which I'm guessing means he has a substantial collection of women's knickers stashed away somewhere.